2018 in Review

Hello! It’s been a really long while. I haven’t been active in blogging this year. I wrote a total of two blog posts this year, and one of which was my 2017 recap! It’s not that I was busy. I just really lost interest in blogging, and sharing my thoughts and opinions, and doing it for the ‘gram. I think there’s not a lot I can say that hasn’t been said yet by other people, so I’ve tried to just keep my thoughts to myself this year. But one thing’s for sure – I’ll never miss this chance to write down my 2018 recap. It’s my way of looking back at my year, and see how far I’ve come, and hey, I’ve been doing this since 2014.

The first half of 2018 was pretty meh. I got promoted to a role I thought I wanted until I realized that I really couldn’t work with my boss. I didn’t feel like I had the autonomy to manage my own team. I was slowly becoming a yes-(wo)man, and I hated it. Being a middle manager with a micromanaging boss is hard, but what’s even worse was that my team was blaming me for their lack of career growth. Of course, I couldn’t just tell them that it wasn’t my decision, because I was expected to own the decision as part of the management team. I think the worst thing for me was that someone I cared for for a long time thought I was actively blocking all opportunities for her to advance, but the truth was the only reason she moved up was because I left, and the company didn’t quite have a choice. It was difficult because I felt like I believed in someone who didn’t believe in me, and thought about me like that. It made me realize that sometimes, people don’t want the truth. They just want the truth that they can accept.

All the stress and sadness and hatred made me sick. I’d have migraines for days on weeks when I didn’t have my period. My hair became really thin. My mental health especially declined. I spent a lot of money on food so that I could deal with my stress. I’d come home every day in tears, crying about something that happened that day. Eventually, I reached my breaking point and resigned.

After leaving all the drama and the sadness behind when I left the corporate life, amazing things started happening. I started healing. I had time to work on the things that mattered to me, and earn more from freelancing. All of a sudden, I don’t hate my life anymore! (Makes me realize I have to thank my old boss for coming into my life. Otherwise, I would not be experiencing this level of success and happiness, and I’d be stuck in a life of drama. Thank you, old boss! You are the sign from the Universe that I so desperately needed.)

Travelling. When I started feeling less stressed and earning more money, I realized that aside from my investments, the best investment I can make is on myself – through learning and travelling. I travelled with friends to Cebu in July, and went on an impromptu trip with Kyle to Bangkok for our 4th anniversary. One month after, we went to Singapore to cover the International Rice Research Summit for FlipScience.

Sirao Garden Cebu
Temple of Leah Cebu
Marina Bay Sands Singapore

Finding love in a hopeless place. I developed friendships with the most unexpected people this year. Makes me excited to see how 2019 will unfold with these people :)

Starting a new hobby. In Q2, I was extremely stressed and needed something to keep me distracted. I turned to collecting cacti and succulents <3 Best low-maintenance hobby ever.

Being happy. At the start of the year, I made a promise to myself that I will be happy this year. And despite all of the shitty things that happened, I feel like I successfully accomplished this goal.

If there are two things I learned this year, it’s that

  1. Happiness is a choice. I’m not discounting people with depression, but for everyone else who doesn’t have a mental illness, or anyone else that doesn’t need professional help, it really starts with the decision to be happy. That means saying no to negative people and drama, and leaving circumstances that don’t work for you anymore.
  2. You get what you settle for. I decided to stop settling for a low-paying long hours fixed-income corpo job that was stressing me out like hell. I stopped saying yes to jobs that I didn’t like, and started working on improving my skills so that I can take on more jobs that I actually like. Today, I make more than twice what I used to make in less amount of time, allowing me to work on the things that I love. I stopped saying yes to bosses that I didn’t like, and started attracting amazing bosses who really cared about me achieving my goals. They have become my mentors, generously sharing with me their knowledge and experience to help me get on the right track to success.

In 2019, I want to continue my goal of being happy, but I want to take it to the next level and be ABUNDANTLY HAPPY. I want to continue radiating happiness and love, and attract abundance and success in my life. I have other goals, but at the end of the day, none as important as being happy.

2018 has been an incredible ride. Here’s to more love and abundance in 2019!-HANA

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